In recent years, some devoted youth have been setting up underground curling leagues around the country to protest the sport’s lack of mainstream support. This came into the news a few weeks ago when the serious injury of one curler emerged as a result of a gang fight between rival curling clubs Krazy Kurling Korps and Good In the Hack, with the member sustaining abrasions to the face and shins. His identity has been withheld to protect his family from potential embarrassment.
These groups set up camp in sewer tunnels, substituting human fecal matter for ice in most cases. Instead of brooms, they use whatever resources they can get their hands on, from broken fluorescent light tubes to femurs. Clubs play each other in Bonspiels of 16 rounds, with the winner most commonly receiving scraps of food scrounged from the sewer walls in order to sustain them until the next match. Malnutrition and malaria run rampant throughout these communities but it has gone largely overlooked by city officials. Many curling clubs are forced to compete for space with other underground sport clubs, such as sewer polo.
We spoke with a member of one of these gangs, Kevin “K-X” Birr, who had this to say: “We’re just trying to make our way in the world, man. The road to Easy Street goes through the sewer.”
Verbum Sap Sat 